Karma

Ever think about why things happen?  Some odd things have happened lately, and some of it just has me scratching my head.

A lady who is not the best driver, which will be apparent to you soon enough, was allegedly driving slow in a parking lot.  The early morning sun was glaring right into the driver's eyes.  Since she couldn't see, she just went real slow.  Guess what she did?  She hit someone.  Not a car.  Some BODY.  She hit a body.  A lady was hit by a car in a parking lot I frequently utilize.  I come walking up and see this lady out cold on the parking lot pavement surrounded by other people and I wonder what happened as I hear sirens in the near distance getting louder and louder.  Someone told me she had been struck by a car. 

Ladies and gents, if the sun is in your eyes, please don't drive real slow.  Find a way to see, or don't drive at all.  And if you are in a parking lot, please don't presume that others can see you.  You know, survival of the fittest and all isn't really working these days.  I hate to judge, but I just can't help myself. 

Now for something a little less dramatic.

I have a brand new cellophane wrapped multi-pack of stamps.  You know the kind you get at Coscto, with like 5 books of stamps.  So that would be 100 stamps, right?  One would think.  I've had this book of stamps on my dresser for oh, 6 months or more.  They are forever stamps, so I'm not in a hurry to use them.  I opened the pack this past weekend because I had something to mail.  I take the first book and pull off the divider stickers because I like to fold it up, and I pull off a stamp and affix it to my envelope.

Then I did a double-take.  What the aych-ee-double-pipes?  At the bottom of the strip of stamps, there is another empty hole.  I only had ONE ENVELOPE TO MAIL.  It's not like my mind played tricks on me and I USED two stamps and I just didn't remember it.  No.  THERE WAS AN UNEXPECTED HOLE ON MY STRIP OF BRAND NEW STAMPS.  The paper was there, but it's like the machine didn't put the sticker on it.  

You know what else?  I checked my other 4 books of stamps.  I have ANOTHER book that is missing TWO IN A ROW.  I kept the cellophane, because my hubby will take them back.  He is very good at confrontation and he will get them to believe that we didn't just "take" the stamps and then claim there were 3 blanks.  Because I'm thinking this story sounds so ridiculous, who is going to believe it?

Karma is going to somehow repay me for 3 stamp shortages.  I just hope Karma doesn't somehow make me pay for passing judgement on a bad driver.

 

And now for something a little more dramatic.

Speaking of Costco, I have to share my favorite Costco story of all time.  There is a karmic twist to it, at least in my opinion.

I hate lazy, careless, disrespectful, self-absorbed slobs who have enough energy to get their slothful butts off the couch to drive to and walk into a store, such as Costco, and walk all around shopping and stuffing their pie holes with free samples, waiting in line to check out, and walking ALL the way back to their cars to store their purchases.  You'd think they could muster up enough energy to take their dagblasted carts back to a corral.  They have enough cart corrals scattered all over (dangerous) parking lots, you'd think they could SEE them.  But no.  Apparently they have lost all of their energy right then and there at their car, so they better hurry up and get home to replace their lazy, selfish butts back in their barcaloungers. 

If you think this is a hot button for me, you'd be right.

Flash backwards, about 7 or 8 years.  Todd and I were visiting our favorite Costco in the KC area.  I'd been witnessing the atrocious behaviour of sloths everywhere, and I'd had it.  When 2 inconsiderate ladies left their cart IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PARKING LOT, not even pushed up to a bush or tree, I said something.  I don't know what I said.  I'm sure it had the word lazy in it.

Anyhoo, we walk up to Costco, and you know what they did?  They drove right up and rolled down their window and confronted us back.  Game on.  You think we were going to take some guff off two lazy inconsiderate witches?  No way.  I do remember them asking what's it to us and we said it's inconsiderate, other people's cars are parked out there and they are so lazy and self-absorbed they couldn't take 5 seconds to actually exercise and take the cart to where it belonged.  They continued to argue.  Teehee.

Really?  HOW could we be wrong?  THEY LEFT THEIR CART IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PARKING LOT!!!!  They continued to argue.  I saw my husband.  He started getting antsy and annoyed with the mindless twits who couldn't understand simple logic.  And then I saw his thumbs.  He started thumbing his stretchy pants waist band.

And then, he did it.

He slowly turned around, bent over, and mooned them.  I'm not talking just a little white cheek.  I'm talking they probably saw balls.

To which they said "Oh nice", rolled up their window and drove away.  We may have let them have the last word, but I had the last laugh.  I laughed my butt off for HOURS over that.  I still get myself worked into a laughing frenzy when I think about it, SO MANY YEARS LATER.  Now that was karma at work--when they leave their carts in a parking lot, and you know they still do, you also know what they are remembering.

Think about it--somewhere some security dude watched Todd moon a car.  We thought about shopping faster in case they wanted to ticket him for indecent exposure.

And this picture?  The very store.
 

Scene of the crime, right here